~ Emails from Mr. Lee, Hong Kong exporter ~

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white of teeth and clean breathing

From: Leej**** @***tradecompany.hk
To: lucas****@****.es
Sent: Thursday, November 18, 2010.
Subject: bicarbonate / cousin Sun / I win prize!!

Dear Mr. Lucas Varela:

Hello to you.

I understand your angry because I have not send update on shipment. I present apologies and excuses. Delay in answering it is because a lot happen. Here it is resume of what happen:

1. Cousin Sun die. He was vegetable with breath machine. Giant Gorilla, our god, decide it is dead time for cousin, so heart attack and dead. (Maybe you read last letter to remember Giant Gorilla religion).

2. I win prize in Best Delivery Time in Hong Kong Of The Year Awards. BDTHKOTYA it is annual ceremony of business men and important enterprise of Hong Kong. I win! LOL, irony to you because to you it is worst delay, it is great delay and you hate my enterprise.

3. I go to jail last week, because irregularities with container I receive from Colombia. I always import bicarbonate from Colombia, keep white teeth!! But some error and confusion and mistake and port police think it is drug LOL. But then we talk to port police and they understand it is all big mistake because sodium bicarbonate it is same color and texture of cocain drug. Then I go out of jail and we take container to our office and use bicarbonate in mouth (for white of teeth) and in inside of nose (clean breathing!). Then we dance DJ music.

4. I go to funeral of port police men, they have accident, they fall over knife in the back and die. They are port police who found our container! Strange coincidence LOL!

5. I receive homicide police men. They think port police do not fall over knife, they think they are victim of murder. We talk to homicide police and we invite them our sodium bicarbonate. They use in mouth and nose and they forget about interrogation and dance DJ music.

So it is been busy times but now I give you update.
On regards of the shipment you await, great delay. To save time, we send new container to you and in same ship we send sodium bicarbonate we sell to Japan friends, but new confusion with Japan police, they also think it is drug. Ship it is stop in Japan port now. Maybe Japan police have accident with knife soon, so do not worry.

Best regards,

Lee J***


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If you enter house in China and you do not say hello and then you go out of house and do not say good bye, that is mean GREAT OFFENSE to owner of house, and maybe then owner of house go and kill you to compensate honor. It is similar when you visit blog and do not say hello. So please leave comment, or if you do not leave comment because you are shy person or not very smart person, then click facebook like button or tweet button, even monkey can click button! If you go out of blog and do not say hello, I find IP address of you and kill you with slow dead to compensate honor, Ok? I very much hope it is all clear now so we avoid mistakes later.

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