From: Leej**** @***tradecompany.hk
To: lucas****@****.es
Sent: Wednesday, December 29, 2010.
Subject: Very Merry Christmas / Christmas depression / Revenge options.
Dear Mr. Varela.
Hello to you, and here it is my wish of Merry Christmas to you: it is card I make with computer and attached to this email.
I tell truth to you now: I do not like Christmas. It is very good time of year to make sweet sweet money with selling of gift products and Santa uniform and everything like that, but it is also time of year to notice the lonely around us, the cold of the heart, the nonsense of the world (I make metaphysic refelction now, so it is warning because maybe you get depression from this email), to notice fake people smile in street and say “Hello, hello, merry Christmas to you Mr. Lee, and happy year” but in inside they think “Hello, hello, I hate you Mr. Lee and I wish you die soon with painful death, for example with parrot revenge”.
So last friday night I get depression, like I do every Christmas. We eat chicken that Liu cook and we drink whiskey, and then more whiskey and then more whiskey. Then we dance over table, and then I give Christmas gift to Liu, that is one extra day of holidays, so this year Liu has one day of holiday! And then I say «Liu, use this day with wisdom, because it is only day of holiday, and you can use it any sunday of the year”. And Liu say “but boss, I do not work on sundays! It is only day I do not work!” and I say “Liu, are you saying no to my gift? That is great damage to honor, do you want little finger of hand cut?» and Liu say many thanks and drink more whiskey.
Please avoid confusion: I wish Merry Christmas because you are friend, but I am planing revenge. I do not decide if chess revenge (you can see email I explain here), parrot revenge (here it is explain) or classic chinese revenge of water drop in head, a.k.a “brain tickle”. I explain now: you sit in chair, naked body and chair it is metal so very cold in butt, and you can’t move. Then a drop of water it is falling on your head, and then another water drop, and then another water drop, and all water drops falling in same place in your head, so it is very, VERY slow erosion of head, many many days and then water drop falling direct to brain LOL, and it is tickle to brain so it is torture of tickle but also torture of horror pain.
So on regard of shipment you await: shipment it is in sea. Captain with good health. It is all good. Very nice weather, whales do not interrupt ship, but there is alert in sea that maybe octopus attack this night. Octopus attacks, very common, they attack with many arms and eat tripulation. So maybe great delay soon, great octopus delay.
I repeat Merry Christmas to you, and I repeat beware of China Dragon Revenge Of Tickle Brain!
Best Regards,
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