~ Emails from Mr. Lee, Hong Kong exporter ~

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in your face surprise inspection

From: Leej**** @***tradecompany.hk
To: lucas****@****.es
Sent: Tuesday, October 18, 2011.
Subject: drugs / fat people for making condoms / ship not in sea / monkey smoke!

Dear Mr. Varela:

Today we have surprise inspection of drugs, for example cocaine to make techno dancing all night, or LSD to float in sky of jewlery or heroine to take sweet needle of mystic experience or maybe mushroom of talking with tree and give hug to nature.
Inspection also see if we make traffic of animals for doing test of cosmetic (LOL, we paint lips of monkey) or tobacco (LOL we make monkey smoke and take picture of monkey, very fun entertainment) because we test cosmetic in monkey and if monkey it is dead or skin of monkey fall or monkey it is suddenly blind (LOL, he hit wall of cage because he not see, very desperate but fun) then cosmetic it is not for sale to Channel or Avon, it is for sale in black market: dark street with organs and cheap iPhone. And same with cigarrettes.
Surprise inspection also look for traffic of fat people for factory of chinese condoms, that is very illegal business because they use fat of people to make cheap condom, very bad quality, and then lucky people go to casual sex, that is mean furious sex of relief of human needs, and cheap condom it is bad for furious casual sex because it is brake and surprise kid.

So I am with Liu in office, this morning, drinking coffee and read newspaper and suddenly glass of roof it is brake and special police of surprise inspection enter through roof with ropes, they are down from helicopter over office, like in movies.
«Freeze» they say very high volume, and then «you are having surprise inspection!». Of course, they do not find monkey or drugs or fat people for condoms, because my company it is clean company of import and export of legal product. LOL and because special police do not find door of secret basement with shipping of acid pills to see bright of colors and techno dance all night with sensation of out of body and everything like that LOL LOL, in your face surprise inspection!!

Regarding shipping you await: great delay, because surprise inspection it is doing inspection in ship and they find monkey making smoke and with red paint in lips (LOL!) so ship it is not in sea. All apologies.

Best Regards,

Mr. Lee.

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If you enter house in China and you do not say hello and then you go out of house and do not say good bye, that is mean GREAT OFFENSE to owner of house, and maybe then owner of house go and kill you to compensate honor. It is similar when you visit blog and do not say hello. So please leave comment, or if you do not leave comment because you are shy person or not very smart person, then click facebook like button or tweet button, even monkey can click button! If you go out of blog and do not say hello, I find IP address of you and kill you with slow dead to compensate honor, Ok? I very much hope it is all clear now so we avoid mistakes later.

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